It's All About the Benjamins

Jump to Comments Yeah, so, uh. Did I do anything on Friday? No. Or did I? I can’t seem to recall anything. I mean, seriously. Oh, wait. I know. I raised money for the German club trip to Germany by babysitting dorks at the Boys and Girls Club. Yeah, that’s it. Or, should I say, I and the Shack and the rest of the German III squad played pool for three hours BWHAHAHAHA.

Yeah, so Saturday was a blast. I woke up to find a wedding shower going on, so I went out to breakfast at Sonic. PANCAKE ON A STICK FUAHAHAHAHA. I then went back to sleep, until about four, when Lalo came over and we worked on our Spanish project for a while. Later on that night, at like 8 or somethign, El Baile and the friendly church squad and I went to Shake and Steak and then Best Buy or something. And then I Didn’t go to sleep until 3 AM, because I was wtaching ROBOTS and then Nero Wolfe, which is a great show, btw. Too bad they only made 1 season of it.

Ran the sound on Sontag. Stayed around and picked up cans around the neighboorhoods for the collection that the church does every December for poor folks. In a way, I like doing this, because, you know, it’s a nice way to help out people that are legitimately poor and doesn’t involve transfer payments, and most people are very eager and happy to be able to donate canned food and whatnot. However, it’s those times when I’m walking from one house to the next, or waiting to see if someone will answer the door, that I really hate it. It’s like, I feel like I’m doing some sort of real-world equivalent of SPAMming or something, going to people’s houses unasked and requesting stuff that’s rightfully theirs. I don’t know. Though, after a while, I ended up working in a group, and didn’t feel any of that. I guess it’s the solitude, the walking in the cold from one 50s ranch to the next, wondering if somebody is actually there, womdering if they’re actually going to donate, or just mutter some excuse forcing me to exit conversation abruptly but still maintain some grace to the thing; if there’s some crazy dog that’s going to attack or worse yet some old man that already had some screws lose when he somehow smuggled his BAR back from Europe. But, you know, whatever.

Went to teh Maal with El Baile and the Megs after that. HOT TOPIC WHAT A CROCK XD Yeah, man, I want to be all counterculural and whatnot, so I’m going to go to a shopping mall and buy my RAGE AGAINST THE MACHINE ANARCHY FOREVER MAN LOOK AT MY NOSE PIERCINGS stuff from a nationwide retail chain. SERIOUSLY. And they didn’t even have a forking Che Guevarra T-Shirt, which is something I’ve always wanted. Well, either that or one with the picture of him and OUR FRIEND FIDEL. FUAHAHAHAHAA

Dear Dr Castro:
Hello. I am a high school student from the United States of America. I think that Cuba is a really neat place. I admire the progress your country has made since your revolution in the areas of literacy, life expectancy, and medical care, among other things. One of those other things, Dr Castro, is the fact that your citizens still make use of automobiles manufactured in the 1950s, which are, of course, the best looking automobiles ever; this is far better for both the environment and the popular aesthetic than America’s three-year-lease ugly-as-sin cannot-go-offroad SUVs. But, to the point. I know that every individual, and therefore, every country, makes mistakes, and, so, too, all countries commit human-rights violations during their histories, which I fully understand, but, of course, don’t particularly condone. However, I don’t think anything like this should cause my government to maintain some silly Cold War era embargo on yours. The People’s Republic of China has thermonuclear warheads aimed at my country, and yet we still trade with them. I hope that sometime soon this silly ban is lifted, so I may visit your country legally before it too is clogged up with Soccer Moms and their SUVs, among other items of much more signifcance.
Best Wishes,
B.H. Lamb
P. S. — do your stores have T-shirts emblazoned with that famous image of Mr. Guevarra and yourself? I wish I could find one here.

But yeah, whatever. As we walked out of the mall, I spotted a shoe store that was selling Adidas Sambas! IN VARIOUS COLORS! OH YES. I rushed in, hoping beyond hope they had the green ones. In case you don’t know, I wore about 5 or 10 pairs of green Adidas Sambas between 3rd grade and whenever they stopped making them. But, alsas, they aren’t making green ones again. But they do have ones that are a green-gray! I’m going to get some, I’m so exited, because the sambas are the best-fitting, longest-lasting shoe ever. (I had a bunch of them becasue I gre out of them, not because they were beyond wearability for any other reason).

Uh, went back to church for the Chirstmas party, whcih was good, but, seriosuly, folks, Don’t subisitute Goldman for a real sound tech. I mean it.

Then I came home and wrote this. The end.